Surviving Valentine’s Day – a single girl's guide

Valentine’s Day. A day filled with warmth and romance for that special person in your life, or should it just be renamed “Singles Awareness Day”?

Yes, it’s that time of year again. If you dare to show your face to the world, then all you will see is couples holding hands or looking into each other’s eyes with the look of a puppy dog. Yuck.

The big day is out to get us and rub it in the faces of all the lonely females out there. It is a day where the woman with an obvious lack of romantic gifts can be spotted amongst the crowd of lovers slobbering over each other’s face. So attractive don’t you think?

It’s bad enough when your best friend asks for your opinion on what to buy their beloved. Then you go shopping and the shop windows are covered in red hearts, roses, and love is everywhere. You can’t escape it, they enjoy shoving single-ness in your face.

Every February 14^th the competition gets fiercer and the bar for the most romantic gesture is raised higher. Valentine’s Day has turned from a bit of harmless fun into something that has the potential to make us miserable. What’s gone wrong?

You arrive at work and your colleagues are welcomed with the largest bouquet of flowers you have ever seen or a bunch of heart-shaped helium balloons and not forgetting the piles of chocolate boxes.

So, instead of crying your eyes out over ‘Titanic’ and stuffing your face with cheap chocolate, turn your day around and remind yourself that you are an independent woman and don’t need to rely on having a man in your life!

Enjoy being single whilst you can. There are many perks to being single once you get down and think about it. You don't have to explain yourself or be nagged by anyone. You can do what you want and appreciate it. In fact, couples should be jealous of you!

Be your own Valentine. Why not treat yourself on Valentine’s Day? If that means buying yourself a bunch of flowers and balloons, so be it – whatever cheers you up. Love yourself, after all that is what the message of the day is supposed to be. The advantage of being single on Valentine’s Day is that you don’t have to spend money on anyone if you don’t want to. Treat yourself to a day engrossed in your favourite book, cook your favourite food or anything that makes you feel good about yourself.

Round up your single friends: Get your fellow single ladies round for a night in with food, wine and a good old gossip. Steer clear of those romantic films and sit down to a classic comedy. Just because you’re single, it doesn’t mean you have to spend the day alone. Enjoy it and most importantly, have fun.

Hit the town: If you don’t want to stay in, why not spend a night on the town with the girls? There is no better way to celebrate your single-ness than going out and having some fun. A glass or two of wine will help you forget the reason you are out in the first place. The chances are that most of the people there will be single too, so it’s your opportunity to find your Valentine for next year!

So, be happy being single. Don’t mope around wishing you had a special man to spend the day with, and definitely don’t feel sorry for yourself, just make it a day of recognising how great it is to be single. Instead of being a couples-only day, let it be a day for loving yourself and enjoy it– those lovers out there don’t know what they’re missing.

Dave Riley - Keeping the charity afloat.

Pictured left is Davy Riley kitted out in his RNLI gear.

A short, slim, ginger-haired man rushes through the doors of the Royal National Lifeboat Institute College and strides over to reception. He looks slightly flustered having just arrived back from a trip to Cornwall. Hung on the walls are artistic drawings of the lifeboat crew at sea, capturing the essence of the work they do for charity. A life-sized portrait of a smiling Dave with a glint in his eye stands prominently at the entrance giving visitors a glimpse of the larger than life personality of the person they are about to meet.

Dave explains how as an 8-year-old, he and his father used to watch the crewmen: “I got involved with sea work because I used to live near the lifeboat station at Eastbourne and regularly heard the maroons sound…I got very excited and ran up to the window to watch the crewmen get the boats ready.” His Mum used to think it was just a phase he was going through but is now very proud of him and his volunteer work.

As a 16 year-old schoolboy, Dave dreamed about having a maritime career. He began working as a lock-keeper in Eastbourne and is currently a Deputy Coxswain for the Royal National Lifeboat Institute (RNLI) in Poole. Dave has the responsibility and skills to ensure the crewmen he works with are ready to save lives. Although he thinks about how his life would be different if he had continued his studies to A-Level and University, he does not regret the way his career has turned out.

“I thrive on the adrenaline rush I get when my pager goes off. I am about to try and save someone’s life, what better feeling can you get than that?”

Glen Mallen works as a Training Manager and is a Poole Lifeboat crew member with Dave. He said: “Dave acts in a professional and considered manner when operating the lifeboat. He has developed into the role of Coxswain at the station very well.”

Dave’s job entails going out in the worst weather conditions and doing what he can to help those in danger.

“I don’t think I’m brave at all. I’m scared of heights…and I can’t bear rollercoasters.”

His worst experience was in Eastbourne when two sailors were close to death after their yacht dismasted. Dave said: “The weather was atrocious; we experienced heavy rain and lightning with winds up to gale force 11. I was frightened but more concerned for the welfare of the people in the yacht than for my own feelings.” Dave and his crew quickly responded to the yachtsmen in trouble. “We ground the yacht and threw out a line to the men. However the yacht sank and the men fell into the sea, making the situation trickier for us. The sea was rough and it was difficult to see where they were.” It was touch and go but eventually the sailors were towed to safety and neither was hurt.

As well as saving lives at sea, Dave also trains new volunteers in everything from the basics of sea survival to navigation and team-work skills and how to fix a boat’s engine whilst on board. He said: “Communication is an important aspect of lifesaving in a team. Students have to be taught how to communicate and then apply this skill whilst at sea.” He is proud to be able to pass on his extensive knowledge whilst training new crews. It is satisfying for Dave to watch new members build up the courage, motivation and determination to brave the harsh waters of the south coast on the RNLI lifeboats.

Anne Millman, a fellow Poole lifeboat crew member and friend said she has learnt a lot from Dave as a trainer. She said: “Dave is great to work with – he is always very calm when put under pressure.” Glen agreed with her: “Dave works in a calm but authoritative manner as a Coxswaine should.”

Watching the simulator Dave uses to train his students on was an extraordinary experience. The whole thing was like watching something from ‘The Day After Tomorrow’ – the wave machine brought realistic waves, and the thunder and lightning created a terrifying atmosphere inside the pool hall. As the lifeboat was launched, the trainees jumped straight in to battle with the violent waves that were crashing into the boat from all angles. When working, Dave wears a yellow waterproof coat, orange life jacket and blue waterproof trousers looking

every bit the professional that he is. He said: “The simulator puts pressure on the students, it encourages them to put into practice all the skills they have learnt in training.” His teaching is professional and tailored to each student who is then offered individual feedback on their efforts.

Although volunteering intrudes into Dave’s social life at the pub, each day brings new and exciting challenges. He has his pager switched on 24/7 and can get called out to sea at any time. “Although it is frustrating if I have just sat down to eat my dinner,

I still feel a great rush of excitement and adrenaline to get out and help whoever is in need.” Being a Coxswain, he has to ensure everyone is ready and understands what they need to do in order to save those in trouble.

The RNLI always do what they can to save a life, but sometimes is cannot be done. In a fatality they have to deal with it and move on. “It is hard but we just have to get on with it and learn from what has happened. You have to put your emotions to the back of your mind and move on.” However, there is always a sense of immense satisfaction after a successful call out.

Of everything Glen has learnt from Dave, he feels resilience is the most important. He said: “Dave has always wanted to be a Coxswain and has demonstrated that if you really want something then it is possible if you continue to work at it.”

Do we secretly hate celebrating Christmas?

Although it may be a bit late, this is an article I wrote shortly before Christmas for my features portfolio. Do you think it's true? Read on...

This celebration was originally a religious one, so why has it turned into everyone’s worst nightmare (even if we don’t have the courage to admit it out loud)?

You buy things you wouldn’t normally buy, just because it is Christmas. The panic in the shops leading up to Christmas is unbelievable, it’s as if the end of the world is just around the corner and people are stocking up to prepare for a disaster. Walking around the town centre, carols blast out from loud speakers and Father Christmas is rings his bell and shouts ‘Ho, ho, ho’ only to be ignored by harassed shoppers.

People expect you to be nice just because of the season, even though they'll use every opportunity to take advantage of that niceness to wangle more money out of you. And how much precious cash do we spend on other people, sometimes people we don’t even know…or like?

What’s with having a tree inside your house? Where did that come from? All it does is drop pine needles all over the floor, ready to be hovered up again. This happens at least ten times every hour. Little chocolates that you can hang on your tree are pointless, before they even reach the tree, they have disappeared into the hungry mouths of greedy children, or adults who have no self-control.

Advent calendars. This year we have been flooded with Ben Ten, who has heard of Ben Ten! It’s a cartoon, and the shelves were stacked with them. No doubt these will be selling for 50p in the clearance corner come 1^st December.

It is one big competition down most streets to see who can provide the most outrageously glowing house, along with a tacky Father Christmas, bought from one of those tacky shops open only for the festive season, screeching Jingle Bells to every passer-by.

Television provides us with Christmas specials that are played on repeat with hundreds of countdowns of Christmas songs, Christmas adverts, Christmas films, Christmas gadgets…Christmas, Christmas, Christmas, are you not sick of the word yet?

The house is stuffed with food, you can hardly navigate your way around the kitchen and every cupboard is bursting at the seams. The reindeer still have to be fed and watered, the presents have to be put into the stockings (without waking the children) and the turkey needs to be put into the oven. You get to bed in the small hours but the turkey alarm wakes you up as soon as your head hits the pillow. Although it has been defrosting since November, when it comes to Christmas Eve, it is still covered in icicles.

Everything is left to the woman of the house at this wonderful time of year. In fact, all things Christmas are left to the females in the family, even buying and wrapping their own presents. I fear that sexism reigns even on this day of caring and ‘sharing’.

On the other hand, there are the couples that are totally unaware of anyone else at Christmas-time. The provide each other with overly large boxes wrapped with the most expensive paper and tied with ribbons and fancy string to show off their love and affection and rub it in the noses of all the lonely singletons out there.

There is a moment of magic when everyone opens their presents and find a few things they like but this is swiftly followed by the wails of a small child who didn’t get what they asked for. This stops as soon as they get their greedy mitts on a toy they did want (which we know will end up on eBay before the year is out). Old people serve quite a good function at Christmas, because they are usually the rudest or the ones who fall asleep first or voice their opinions loudly. We buy presents then find the recipients trying to hide their disappointment because they don’t actually like it.

Everyone should turn vegetarian for Christmas dinner, it would be so much easier.

Christmas crackers don’t exactly provide anyone with ‘presents’ but they do give everyone a chance to wear paper hats and look like a complete wally.

Then the kitchen looks as if a bomb’s hit it. This is the time when everyone (apart from Mum) lounges in front of the television, discarding all the gifts and wrapping paper surrounding them.

All those hours of preparation and it’s over in 24 hours. And then it’s off to the sales on Boxing Day to start the whole process in time for next year. Who’s excited?!

A life in a day: Natalie O'Hare

This is the first article I had to produce for the features module of the Multi-Media Journalism course at BU. Pictured left is me after coming 4th in an Irish dancing competition at the beginning of the year. (And yes, it is a wig!)

The 18 year old from Abingdon juggles life working as a lifeguard with Irish dancing. She lives with her mother, Julie and father, Tom.

I find waking up one of the hardest things to do. When my alarm blasts out Radio One at 5:15am I find myself pressing the 'snooze' button. To help me through the winter mornings I eat a bowl of coco pops filled to the top with milk otherwise I can't function properly. I put on my lifeguard red and yellows – hung on the radiator to keep them warm - find my whistle and head out the door. Cycling to work is quick it only takes 5 minutes and helps me wake up.

My home is five miles from the cultural city of Oxford. Whenever I meet new people it's easier to say I live in the city rather than the oldest inhabited town in England but the usual response is 'Oooh aren't you posh?!' This is not how I see myself! I live with my Mum and Dad in a four-bedroom house in Abingdon. My brother Daniel now edits & reads the Traffic news in Bristol and my sister Christina hopes to find a designers job in Southampton.

By 6am I'm outside the local leisure centre and find a long queue of early risers ready for their morning swim. It’s hard to understand how anyone can contemplate exercise at stupid O'clock. Once up in the lifeguard chair it’s time to be alert and ready to scan the pool. After an hour on poolside there’s a staff call to go to the ladies loo. Someone has left a nice surprise for me to clean up! It annoys me when people think that a lifeguard's only duty is to sit on their posterior all day - it's just not true! We have to clean windows and walls, sweep and mop floors then set up equipment for various sports sessions and worst of all, scrub body fat and hair from the drains – oh the glamour of it all. My working day finishes at 2:30pm and I leave as the late team arrive to take over.

Once home I make couscous for lunch. It takes minutes and tastes fantastic. Then I pour a glass of orange juice and sit in front of the TV to watch an episode of “Neighbours” with mum. We have watched it since I was little so it has become a bit of a ritual for us when she gets back from work. Hannah always calls for a quick chat on the latest gossip and to make plans for Saturday night. We enjoy clubbing in Oxford because of the vibrant atmosphere and it is always packed with excited students.

“It annoys me when people think that a lifeguard's only duty is to sit on their posterior all day - it's just not true!”

Dinner must be before five on Mondays because I have to get to Swindon for six for an Irish Dancing lesson. This is two hours of hard work and a lot of sweat but I am very passionate about it and have travelled all over the world to compete. The most exciting place was Philadelphia, USA, where I took part in the World Championships preceded by a sneaky trip to New York before I danced.

By the time I get home it is already 9pm so I start getting my things ready for the next day's activities. Before this I make time for an episode of “Waterloo Road” pre-recorded on Sky Plus. This is when my parents and I relax in front of the television without having to think about anything else. It is enjoyable watching because there’s humour in their unrealistic representation of secondary school life. A full blown shoot out wasn’t a regular occurrence at my school so I like to see it as my little bit of drama therapy!

I always try to get to bed by eleven but I usually find other things to do as I believe sleeping is such a waste of time! Although my bed is the comfiest place in the world with its memory foam mattress and plump pillows. I make myself a quick cup of tea – 3 sugars and lots of milk – and climb into bed. Rereading “The Time Traveller's Wife” is a soothing end to the day. By this time it is one O’clock and my drooping head tells me it's time to sleep.

Original News Story - Undergraduate helps renovate Southampton restaurant

Young graduate, Christina O’Hare recently helped renovate a local Southampton restaurant, ‘Old Delhi Eatery’ and Gordon Ramsey has visited to taste the food.

For the final of “Britain’s best local restaurant”, 10,000 nominated restaurants were narrowed down to 50, with ten in each food category. The food at each place was tried and tested by Janet Street Porter – a British television personality, Jean Baptiste – Gordon’s chief chef, or Ramsay himself.

This is why Gordon Ramsay was at ‘Old Delhi Eatery’. The restaurant was a contender in the Indian Cuisine category. The marketing executive and graduate, Christina O’Hare, was fully involved with the renovation of the place. Her role included the exterior design, creating new menus and web design. She thinks that eating out in Southampton has moved up a notch and is in a different league to other areas. Christina said: “Having Gordon Ramsey taste the food here shows how successful [Old Delhi Eatery] has become after the refurbishment.”

Executive chef Abdul Kayam said: “Christina has been an asset to us and has given our restaurant the opportunity it needed to compete with upmarket restaurants in Southampton. Cooking with Chef Ramsay was also a fantastic experience ”

Abdul recently opened another restaurant called the ‘Bangkok Brasserie’ in Winchester after his experience with Gordon Ramsay.

Running News Story...literally!

A suspected double murderer has been shot dead by armed police gunmen at Saint Marks Primary School, Wallisdown following a series of attacks around Bournemouth today.

Police tracking helicopters were used to follow the suspect, who can now be named as Pascal Tong, aged 20.

They negotiated with him to lower his crossbow bolt, previously stolen from Chapel Gate Sports Centre, he did not comply and as a result was shot from a long range.

The fire-filled house on Pine Road, Winton, is now under control. It can be revealed it was the home of Shaz Tong, the mother of the suspect, who was found dead and decapitated with extensive burn injuries.

The suspect was seen zooming away from the incident and shouting “very nasty language” as fire-fighters arrived at the scene.

Fireman, Rocky Robinson said: “It is absolute inferno, the house is burning in a crazy way.”

One of his victims, Mallini Rattue, was a father of two who died after being shot in the eye with an arrow in Chasedown, Bournemouth.

He was travelling to Bournemouth from Belgium for the Bonsai International Show.

A friend and fellow Bonsai tree grower, Dennis Landbert aged 62 said: “I’m in shock…it’s a very sad day.”

This attack was linked to an earlier break-in at the Chapel Gate Sports Centre, near Bournemouth Airport.

A spokesperson for Dorset Police said: “Nasty, threatening graffiti has been sprayed on the walls and an apparent theft of sports equipment has occurred”

A standard Olympic crossbow bolt was stolen from the John Verdon Archery Centre and this same weapon was used on all the victims of today’s attacks.

One witness described it as a “William Tell contraption”.

Forensics investigated the crime scene, looking for DNA and fingertips.

Prior to this incident, a Norfolk Terrier was shot by the “maniac” riding his scooter.

Pippa Shufflebottom, the owner of Bouncebackability, was clipping the dog’s hair in the park at Horseshoe Common when the gun was fired.

She said: “People like that are sick.”

Bouncebackability is making a good recovery and is currently being looked at by a vet.

Assistant Chief Constable Alan Rose said there will be a full investigation due to the circumstances of Tong’s death.

Earliest Memory Assignment

Pictured left is Ernest, with wife Francis and dog Sunny.

As a seven years old, Ernest Withall was close to death when a bomb landed feet away from his home in Croydon.

Now aged 77 the memories of those fateful years of the Second World War are still at the front of his mind.

The ex-army officer said: “Although we were very frightened, we soon got used to the loud noises of the bombs and had to get on with life”.

He remembers how scared he was when the war broke out. It had a significant effect on his childhood, and today he regularly remembers the flaming streets of his targeted hometown.

Having his father abroad working for the RAF at the time made things more difficult for the Withall family. Ernest, his mother and baby sister were left at home to cope by themselves in a time of complete devastation.

Soon after leaving England, his father became a prisoner of war in Barth, Germany. Because of this, Ernest had to take on many of his father’s responsibilities. His mother went to work whilst the young boy had to look after his newly born sister.

“When we heard the air raid sirens, we ran to the shelters. As children, we thought it was great fun”.

Even though the war brought negativity to the community, Ernest saw it as an opportunity for everyone to work together.

Now retired from work as an army officer, Ernest lives in Ferndown, Bournemouth and is able to relax with his wife Francis and two dogs Toby and Sunny.